Где ошибки, подскажите?

Question

A young man named Oliver came to the supermarket for shopping.
FOR his mother had to come and Oliver wanted to impress her.
He wished TO WELCOME her WITH A REAL FEAST (...by offering a real feast).
Oliver looked THROUGH the shopping list and realized that THE eggs WERE MISSING.
So HE WENT to the dairy section.
Then there CAME A SOUND OF (a) collision.
Oliver saw a young girl PICKING UP HER scattered buyS AND into the basket.
THEN (immediately) Oliver offered help, BUT she refused him and went to the checkout.
Oliver turned and looked INTO his basket.
There lay a red purse.
OLIVER realized that IT HAD BEEN dropped (LEFT) BY the girl and ran to find her.
He found the girl (NEAR) at the cash register.
She WAS TELLING the cashier OF HER wallet accidentally lost.
Oliver CAME UP and returned THE purse TO HER. (ИЛИ "...handed her the purse")
The girl quietly thanked him.

Aizada Darieva · Accepted Answer

A young man named Oliver came to A supermarket for shopping. Неопределенные артикли - все упоминается впервые.

To his mother had to come and Oliver wanted to impress her. He wished her well 
and eats feed.(???) Этот перл требует расшифровки. Можно догадываться, что his mother was to visit him, или he expected his mother for dinner. Порядок слов надо соблюдать, модальность выбирать правильно

Oliver looked at the (his) shopping list and realized that he forgot (had forgotten) to buy eggs. 
 Oliver saw a young girl who was COLLECTING scattered things (packages)
back into the basket. Fold - это складывать что-то складывающееся, раскладушку, например. 
When Oliver offered her help she refused and went to the checkout.
To refuse употребляется в моделях to refuse to do smth, to refuse smth to smb, to refuse smth. Как у вас, его употребить нельзя.
HE realized that his dropped the girl ???( the girl must have dropped it)) and ran to find her (after her). 
He found the girl at the cash register (за кассой? ) . She explained that the
 cashier accidentally lost wallet (кассир потерял кошелек?) . Oliver handed the purse over to her. Purse, это, кстати, и женская сумка.

Светлана Грозненская · Answer

A young man named Oliver came to the supermarket for shopping. 
FOR his mother had to come and Oliver wanted to impress her. 
He wished TO WELCOME her WITH A REAL FEAST (...by offering a real feast). 
Oliver looked THROUGH the shopping list and realized that THE eggs WERE MISSING. 
So HE WENT to the dairy section. 
Then there CAME A SOUND OF (a) collision. 
Oliver saw a young girl PICKING UP HER scattered buyS AND into the basket. 
THEN (immediately) Oliver offered help, BUT she refused him and went to the checkout. 
Oliver turned and looked INTO his basket. 
There lay a red purse. 
OLIVER realized that IT HAD BEEN dropped (LEFT) BY the girl and ran to find her. 
He found the girl (NEAR) at the cash register. 
She WAS TELLING the cashier OF HER wallet accidentally lost. 
Oliver CAME UP and returned THE purse TO HER. (ИЛИ "...handed her the purse")
The girl quietly thanked him.