Лингвистика

Please can you check my essay about living lealthy lives Thanks everybody

1. “Prevention is better than cure”. Out of a country’s health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventative measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? (Cambridge IELTS 2)
Many economists claim that it is more economical for the state if their people are more healthy and do not suffer from serious diseases. That's why the government should pay due consideration on enlightening people about leading healthy lifestyles.
For example, a lot of health-oriented programs have been launched for the last ten years in the Russian Federation. They encourage people to live healthy lives. These programs are supported and funded by the governments. Top-level scientists in the field of medicine explain all repercussions causes by smoking, drinking spirits, overeating, eating junk food and so on. According to the statistics, since the launch of these programs expenditures on curing people have dwindled considerably.
The other way of encouraging people to live healthy lives is newspapers and social advertisements.
It is proved by scientists that there is link between cancer and smoking. People who do not smoke less suffer from cancer. For example, recently there have been an experiment. Two hundred people addicted to smoking were offered to watch a social advertisement about smoking during two weeks. This social advertisement contained harrowing videos and photos showing the effect of smoking on people's body. After the experiment almost four fifth of testees gave up smoking.
By the way, school are going to have compulsory lessons devoted to health in the curriculum.
In summary, population is the main aspect of existing of any state. Healthy population can be describes as a driving force of the economy. The more people are healthy the more money will be saved and can be spend on other aspects of life. Taking into consideration the above facts
the government certainly should allocate some money to educate the public about consequences of having unhealthy habits.
ДП
Дмитрий Потёмкин
409
Many( и все-таки не рекомендуется употреблять many в утвердительных предложениях, скорее в отрицательных и вопросительных, заменяйте на a lot of, some, quite a number of, more и то лучше) economists claim that it is/would be more economical for the state if ITS people/CITIZENS WERE healthIER and DID not suffer from serious diseases. That's why the government should pay due consideration/ATENTION TO enlightening people about leading healthy lifestyles(LIVES. Lifestyle is a word much abused, it's never a life, but always a lifestyle...)
For example, a lot of health-oriented programs have been launched for/OVER the last ten years in the Russian Federation. They encourage people to live healthy lives. These programs are supported and funded by the government. Top-level scientists in the field of medicine ( они называются opinion leaders) explain all THE repercussions OFsmoking, drinking spirits, overeating, eating junk food and so on. According to the statistics, since the launch of these programs expenditures on HEALTH CARE have dwindled/GONE DOWN (dwindle имеет негативную коннотацию) considerably.
The other way of encouraging people to live healthy lives is newspapers and social advertisements.
It HAS BEEN proved by scientists that there is/EXISTS A link between cancer and smoking. People who do not smoke suffer from cancer LESS. For example, recently there have been an experiment. Two hundred people addicted to smoking were offered to watch a social advertisement about smoking FOR ( отвечает на вопрос как долго?) two weeks. This social advertisement contained harrowing videos and photos showing the effect of smoking on people's bodIES. After the experiment almost four fifthS of testees gave up smoking.
By the way, schoolS are going to have (compulsory) health lessons in the curriculum.
TO SUMMARIZE, THE population is the main aspect/REASON of existANCE FOR any state. A Healthy population can be describeD as a/THE driving force of the economy. The more people are healthy the more money will/CAN be saved and SPENT ON other aspects of life. Taking into consideration the above (facts) the government certainly should allocate money to educate the public about (THE) consequences of having unhealthy habits.
Мирслан Магомедов
Мирслан Магомедов
58 219
Лучший ответ
Дмитрий Потёмкин Большое спасибо
about living healthy lives

four fifthS ?

can be describeD
Катерина Солдатенко
Катерина Солдатенко
79 990
Дмитрий Потёмкин Спасибо ,Александр

Похожие вопросы