Лингвистика

Правильный ли перевод с русского на английский? Какие ошибки?

На всякий случай скажу, что я не работаю переводчиком и не спихиваю часть работы на пользователей "Ответов", а самостоятельно изучаю английский.

Заранее спасибо за помощь.

P. 83, Ex. 18 (B) Render in English close to the text. (Everyday English edited by T. U. Drozdova)

Её глаза под густыми ресницами казались совсем темными. Цвет её глаз поражал еще и потому, что был совершенно необычен для блондинки. Веки были полуопущены, что было характерным для неё, когда она была поглощена своими мыслями. У нее были четко очерченные, довольно густые брови.

С первого взгляда ее лицо с чуть выступающими скулами и мягкими линиями казалось классически правильным. Но стоило присмотреться и оказывалось, что нос у нее несколько неправильной формы, рот большой, а губы полные и крепкие. Лицо ее было удивительно женственно и вместе с тем энегично. Волосы она гладко зачесывала назад и повязывала вокруг головы черную ленточку.

Her eyes under thick eye-lashes seemed to be quite dark. And also the colour of her eyes amazed because of his intypical nature for a blonde. Her eyelids were semi-drooping, and that was her ordinary feature when she was absorbed in thought. She had well-marked and quite bushy eyebrows.

Her face with slightly protruding cheekbones and soft lines seemed to be classically regular at the first sight. But if to look closely, one could notice her nose having quite an irregular form, her mouth being large, and her lips being full and firm. Her face was extremely womanlike and vigorous at the same time. Her hair was swept-back and restrained by a black fillet.
Her eyes under thick eye-lashes seemed to be quite dark. Tthe colour of her eyes was amazing, very unusual for a blonde. Her eyelids were half-lowered and that was her ordinary feature when she was absorbed in thought. Her eyebrows were well-shaped and rather thick . (bushy - это у Брежнева) .

Her face with fairly prominent cheekbones and soft lines seemed to be classically regular at first sight. But at a closer look one could notice that her nose was somewhat irregular, her mouth large, and her lips full and firm. Her face was extremely feminine and vigorous at the same time. She wore/was wearing her hair swept back and held back with a black ribbon
Метки: английский перевод русский язык
Юлия Журавлева
Юлия Журавлева
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Her eyes under thick lashes seemed quite dark. The color of her eyes smote also because it was quite unusual for a blonde. Eyelids were poluopuscheny that was characteristic of her when she was absorbed by his thoughts. It has been clearly defined, fairly bushy eyebrows.

At first glance her face with a slightly prominent cheekbones and soft lines seemed classically correct. But as soon as look at and it turns out that the nose of her somewhat irregular shape, large mouth and full lips and strong. Her face was surprisingly feminine and yet enegichno. She wore it smoothly brushed back and tied a black ribbon around her head.